More on time: the writer, the hitchhiker, and the wise woman in Rhode Island

When you put your eye on something and get intentional about looking at it— like staring deep into a flower and seeing pollen grains on the stamens and tiny etchings inside the petals—you start noticing the object of your attention everywhere.

This week the object of my attention was time.  I publicly declared in my last post that I was going to give my time to the Lord and not strive when the “man makes the plan” part morphed into “but the Lord directs the steps.”

It’s not so easy.

I daresay a majority of successful writers advise writing every day. I have no small children, no outside job, no urgent situation clawing at my sleeves. Still, days go by when I’ve been so busy my butt hasn’t hit a chair cushion and I haven’t written a word. Then I get anxious, and the self-defeating recording clicks on: “You’re really not a writer—you just got lucky with one book.”

I beat that one down with the vigor of a kid at a bonk-the-gopher game. But soon the anxiety of time gone by with nothing tangible to show for it competes with my fifteen minutes of cardio for a sweat breakout.

Today I planned a writing schedule that would make Stephen King proud: morning devos, gym, write. After morning time with the Lord, I went to the gym with my daughter. She actually likes going there.  I go to get the health meter stable. Being finished long before she, I looked forward to hurrying home and getting to my desk.

The look in her eyes compelled me to linger. Some overly contoured guy trailing her made her feel uncomfortable. Her eyes pleaded mom’s presence.

I stayed pasted in the hip adductor chair and squeezed twelve more times. My write time now bumped to after the other morning have-to’s.

The day before, my husband and I were headed to a shooting range for some target practice after which I had a few things planned like hand chop the jungle encroaching my fence, vacuum the pool, and do SOMETHING with the interminable pile of clothes that used to be put away.

While we gassed up at a quik stop, a young man approached us and said he was trying to get to a neighboring town (which just so happened to be near the one we were headed to). Seeing no weapon in  his T-shirt, shorts and flip flops, my husband told him to get in.

I was concerned about the detour this would put in the time of our shooting appointment, but my husband’s quick question to the kid’s rambling thoughts stopped me short.

“Do you know the Lord?”

“Yes,” he said. Further probing revealed a mind confused, a young man grasping for something to reclaim himself from jail and drugs. We talked for the thirty minutes it took to get to the place a friend was holding his “things” while he got his life back together. (I want to talk more about his questions next post, for now, sticking to the time theme.).

I don’t know the impact of our “time” diversion in this man’s life, but that’s God’s business. We (thanks to the hubby) let go of our schedule and route to pursue what smacked of God.

And then to top off the “time” thoughts in my mind, one friend, Lori Roeleveld, a wise woman in Rhode Island, expanded this theme of God’s time in a provoking post (she always has provoking posts!) Please 

stop by Deeper with Jesus in Rhode Island and be refreshed. She elucidates the issue well and concludes the gist of the post.

P.S. Because Thomas Nelson has just released my book, several writer friends have worked it into their own blogs in support of me. I appreciate the time it took for them to do so.

 Please stop by Leslie at the hallowed Path http://thehallowedpath.wordpress.com/2012/07/30/call-of-a-coward-the-god-of-moses-and-the-middle-class-housewife-a-book-review/

And thanks for stopping here . I so am humbled God would use me to encourage another.

My Time, My Turf, My Toy

Six-pound visiting boy puppy has no self-esteem issues. He likes to stir up quiet. Get things going. He reflects his name—Capone. No matter how vigorously resident girl dog growls and tussles, or how silently anyone tries to ignore boy puppy, he’ll persevere in finding fun.

Girl dog will tolerate a lot. She’ll share her bones and her water dish, even her de-stuffed favorite kiwi toy. But she draws the line when it comes to sharing us. When she’s sitting on the footrest of the man’s recliner, she does not, will not, share the space with anyone except the man. Fortunately, boy puppy can’t jump that high so he just dances around the perimeter and ignores her growls.

Refereeing their turf wars made me reflect on my own yard-dog tendencies. I’ll share my home and my stuff (well, kind of touchy about my computer) and even my money. But I draw the line, get downright growly about my sharing my time.

I can make a good case for myself in defense of this. After all, there are tons of books written about drawing boundaries, saying no, and managing every twenty minutes of your day. But after finding myself in the same scenario three times this week and having the same nasty reaction, I suspected that no matter how much I tried to justify myself the Lord was making a point.

Although Jesus knew when he needed time out with his Father, he let people interrupt whatever he was doing. After all, that’s what he was about—healing the sick and proclaiming the gospel.  

In the course of a typical afternoon, while talking to John’s disciples about fasting Jesus was interrupted by a synagogue official who begged him to go to his home and lay hands on his sick daughter. Along the way, a woman cut through his entourage and clutched the hem of his garment. (I might have gotten a bit testy right about now) but Jesus stopped to speak to her when he felt power going from himself and made her well.

He then continued on the way of his original destination and healed the official’s daughter. Maybe he would have liked to call it a day, but some blind men followed and begged him for their own healing. Jesus took the interruption in stride, paused to hear their request, and then healed them.

What I’m seeing is that Jesus let himself be interrupted by others’ concerns, because he was always about his Father’s business. Now for those of us with task-oriented personalities, this is a crown to win. I don’t know what obstacle the people-oriented folk have to overcome, but sitting still through conversations that go way off track, or meetings that digress into personal needs, makes my legs restless.

“I have more THINGS to do than sit here,” the railing voice inside my head that I’m sure everyone hears, is yelling.

Really?

“Abide in Me,” Jesus says.

I’m thinking about that this week—giving my time to the Lord. Making my plans but being open about the interruptions, especially the ones that take me out of my comfort zone and require I hunker down and just be instead of do.

If I really abide in him, will he not make even the things I have to do be done more efficiently? Maybe even like the moment when the disciples received him into their boat and “immediately the boat was at the land to which they were going.”—John 6:21

What do you think?

Steadfast in those in between places

Google images-Jasper Johal

 Many of us have no problem believing God was or even that he is to come. It’s the middle part that gives us trouble. The part in between where we have to remain steadfast, unwavering with faces fixed firmly on the promise his presence. The persevering immoveable part.

I love how Oswald Chambers explains perseverance: “Perseverance is more than endurance. [It is] more than hanging on . . . . Perseverance is our supreme effort of refusing to believe our hero is going to be conquered.”

Chambers says that “one of the greatest stresses in life is the stress of waiting for God” –as anyone who’s tried to sell a house or land a job or see a breakthrough in a difficult situation knows.

Recently I received two pieces of correspondence from people that most writers aspire to hear from—publishers and agents. The agent was responding to a query I had sent her one-and-a-half years ago. She said although my story sounded remarkable, memoirs were a hard sell, especially for first-time authors, so best wishes in finding someone else to represent me.

Within a day of receiving this belated response from the agent, I received the first copy of that same difficult-to-sell “memoir” which will be released in a few weeks by Thomas Nelson, the world’s largest Christian publisher. I cried when I read the enclosed personal note telling me they were honored to be my publisher.

Two notices. One rejecting a dream, the other celebrating its fulfillment.

As I held the two messages, I thought about how I felt when I had queried the agent that year past. I was full of hope and expectation and possibility. Although disappointed my query garnered no response, I pursued other opportunities, certain within my being that God had a way.

How thankful I am for the sense of steadfastness, for the conviction that I was doing what I was supposed to be doing, for the confidence that although the conventions of worldly wisdom would dismiss my work as being unsellable, God’s purposes would prevail.

James tells us that the testing of our faith produces steadfastness. If you are experiencing a difficulty, I pray that you would not waver in the time between what was and what is to come. And may your perseverance not be of fierce hanging on because you don’t dare let go, but of joyful confidence that indeed your hero is not defeated, that although you can’t see him in this present trial, HE IS.

Lord, today, regardless of what we see, I join my heart with my friends stopping here today and proclaim My heart is steadfast, O God; I will sing, I will sing praises, even with my soul. Ps 108:1

Harbinger

The scenery passing by the car window, the words in the book I was reading aloud to my husband as he drove, and the news flash on the radio all converged in a maelstrom of conflict. Beauty and chaos. Defiant power and judgment.  Israel. America.

Merciful God.

We were driving from South Carolina to Vermont. I had brought along the book The Harbinger by Joseph Cahn, to help pass some of the seventeen hours in the car. Although impatient with the author’s repetitive narration, I was fascinated with the case he made for the warning of judgment on America. The chilling connection between the words of Isaiah 9:10 and the events of 9/11 were difficult to dismiss.

Linking bricks, hewn stone, sycamore trees and cypresses to Ground Zero and America’s foundations, Cahn couches the voice of a prophet in the form of a fictional narrative.

What if it’s true? What if God is really begging us to turn back NOW?

As Cahn asserts, we have lost sight of where our favor comes from. A people so deceived we don’t even recognize that the very words proclaimed from the nation’s capital as a show of our country’s strength are actually God’s words of judgment against Israel and possibly America’s defiance.

Superimposed on the scene in the car was the one outside. The rolling hills and white-fence horse pastures of the Virginia countryside, all topped with sunshine and fluffy clouds, showcased a land blessed with peace and beauty and favor. It was difficult to imagine it otherwise.

I took a break from reading and turned on the radio just in time to hear the announcement of the Supreme Court’s decision on Obamacare.  As upset as I was with Justice Roberts, I had to agree with his statement: “It’s not our job to protect the people from their political choices.”

No. We will all reap the consequences individually and collectively of our choices.

 Our choice to hand over our lives to the government control.

Our choice to remove all vestiges of God from public places.

Our choice of whether or not to “humble ourselves and pray, and turn from our wicked ways so that God would hear from heaven and forgive our sin and heal our land.’—2 Chronicles 7:14

We passed a lone billboard on the edge of a field. Its message simple: “You will meet God.”

One way or another, regardless of which choice we make.

I powered down my Nook and shut off the radio. What did these past moments of sobering reflection mean to me? 

As a child of God, I have been given the responsibility to be a bearer of truth, but so often have remained silent in the noise of the mockers, cowered in fear of loss of favor.

 God has equipped me, as well as all his children, to proclaim his glory, why should I fear?

We may live in times of encroaching darkness, but “the light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.”—John 1:5 

May those of us who walk with God, rouse ourselves, shake off our lethargy, and take up our appointed positions in such a time as this.

God Is Able to Turn a Woman's Heart

Hillsong cover image from Wikipedia

Having candidly aired the not-always-so-illustrious working out of my own faith, I was curious about how it was for another woman from middle-class America to pack up her family and consider a move to a foreign field.

Today, Kris Gnuse, the woman I mentioned in the previous post, is gracious enough to give us a glimpse into her heart as she and her family prepare for a move to Hogar de Vida (Home of Life) in Atenas, Costa Rica.

http://www.homesoflife.org/

My Way or Your Way: Trusting God

Kris gave me a little back story which I think represents a huge issue for wives, regardless if it concerns the mission field or the finances: To trust God enough with your own well-being that you are able to support your husband’s conviction of God’s call—even if it terrifies you.

Back in 2006, all was well with the Gnuse family. Kris and her husband, Matt, loved God and believed they were following him, that is, until the Lord seemed to give Matt direction which had not first cleared Kris’s spiritual radar. When Matt announced he thought God would have them go on a team trip to Guatemala, Kris balked. What would they do with their two small children? And how would they raise the money?

One night, after weeks of holding onto her, “no,” and yet another “verbal tangle” with her husband, Kris heard the Lord ask, “"Do you want my way, or your way?" 

 The realization (that she wanted her way) sobered her and shocked her out of her disobedience. She prayed the prayer that is often the only one it takes—"Lord, help me to want your way."

She says, “I was in tears most of the first (team)meeting.  But the Lord came alongside us and blessed us. He provided such abundance that we not only covered our own costs, but those of another team member as well. The Lord had even provided for our children's hearts. Our four- year- old daughter came to us as we lingered over goodbyes at her grandparents’ house and said, "I want you to go now."  She was impatient to begin her special time with people she loved. 

You continued to go on mission trips and are now planning to spend time in Costa Rica this summer before moving there in 2013. What made you decide God was calling you to this time and place?

When we were in Costa Rica as a family in 2008, the Lord spoke to Matt about us living there someday.  Matt was ready to move as soon as the Lord gave us clearance for take-off, but my heart was rooted in a secure income, a nice house, comfortable routine.  Slowly, over the last few years, the Lord has been moving me to let go of these temporary things to take a greater hold on Him and His eternal treasures.  

Last summer, after Matt and I led a team to Hogar de Vida in Guatemala, we realized our hearts were in Costa Rica, and that was where the Lord was calling us.God continued to give confirmation, and when Connie, our global outreach pastor, suggested a two year launch period with us beginning language school in August of 2013, it resonated with what we were each hearing separately.

We are incredibly blessed to be part of a church that has a sending arm, Shelter of Light, to launch and support their global workers.  They are walking us through the process and will provide our spiritual and authority covering as we serve in Costa Rica.  

 How do your children feel about it?

They are all excited, but it can be hard to tell what is going on in their hearts, especially with the boys as they are young.  Our 10 year old daughter is the one who best understands what she is releasing for us to go.  Part of our prayer is that the Lord would make a special place for each member of our family in this new life He's calling us to.   

What fears or challenges are you facing now in anticipation of your move?

 Trusting the Lord for provision to this extent is new ground for us. Some of our biggest concerns are selling our house in a tough market and raising up a community of prayer warriors and financial supporters. Mastering the Spanish language is another hurdle that can feel pretty high. 

I certainly feel overwhelmed at times.  For instance, when I look around our house and see all the stuff that we have, I'm daunted.  Sometimes these four walls of our home feel much more real than our electronic tickets to fly and the still small voice calling us to go. 

 But we have seen how the Lord changes lives through global journeys, and we pray that He would give others a heart for that process and for our family as we step into a place of receiving teams at Hogar de Vida in Costa Rica.  We hope to be a blessing as we act as a bridge between the two cultures. 

What are some things that helped prepare your heart and courage?

The Lord has been kind to provide encouragement and inspiration through the mentoring and leadership of our church family, the testimonies of people who have been there (often through books like yours), and the faith walks of those around us. 

One verse in particular was prayed over me a while back and continues to speak peace to my heart, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight" Proverbs 3:5-6. 

Also, being a part of our church's worship choir has ministered to my heart more than anything else. One Hillsong song, "God is Able," seemed to appoint itself as the theme song for this part of our journey. The words of the chorus especially encourage me: 

                  "God is with us.  God is on our side.  He will make a way. 

                   Far above all we know.  

                  Far above all we hope. He has done great things."

Our prayers and blessings go with this family in their walk of faith.

If you'd like to keep in touch with news from the Gnuse family, please visit them at thegoodnewsfamily.wordpress.com .

Financial support can be made out to Shelter of Light and mailed to: (Memo:Gnuse Family)

 Shelter of Light

15555 West Dodge Road

 Omaha, NE 68154

Counting the Costs

Little did I expect the divine connection waiting for me as I followed the link from a Google alert of my book.

The blog post , Full Heart Moment, began, “My heart is full tonight. The last two months have been a flurry of activity. . . . In a quiet afternoon of leisure at my in-laws’ pond a few weeks ago, with the sun shining down and the warmth of camaraderie all around me, my heart suddenly felt a pang.  I was leaving this. And a season of counting the cost began.”

I could almost see the writer squaring her shoulders, breathing deeply as she lovingly touched each of the “costs” one more time before laying them down—security of paychecks, homes and gardens, comforts of friends and family, holidays with parents and Mom’s signature dumplings.

I wondered where this writer was going that she needed to sell off her children’s toys, and get her house in order. What decision had she made that caused her to feel so reflective about “counting the cost.”

As if the word Guatemala wasn’t enough to get my attention, combining it in the same sentence with Costa Rica certainly was. I scrambled around her blog site and discovered that not only had this woman been to the same village in Guatemala as we had, but to the same ministry in Costa Rica.

 In fact, she and her family were preparing to move there for full time ministry with our dear friends, Tim and Dena at Hogar de Vida!

And then the gift: someone had lent her Call of a Coward. In her time of weariness, from the comfort of her chair, she was able to travel familiar dusty paths with me, to face shared fears, to rejoice and be refreshed at the fountain of grace.

Two ordinary women, half a country apart, on a similar journey, linked by a story.

 I was one in spirit with her as I read her conclusion:

“Tonight my heart is full with all that the Lord has in store for us.  The cost is real, but so is the blessing of trusting him more fully.”

Please join me again later in the week as I interview Kris Gnuse about her family’s upcoming move to Costa Rica.

Lessons From a Rule-Breaker

A brand new believer who is staying with us was excited when he came downstairs the other morning. “I read the gospel of John last night,” he said. “Wow. God’s not really that complicated. He basically wants us to believe Him.”

Ah, yes. The beauty of meeting Jesus, of having a relationship rather than a rule book. Of believing He is who He says He is—approachable God. 

Although the way to Him is one—through His Son, His ways of dealing with us are many.

Having walked with the Lord for many years, I am still surprised and delighted at the myriad of ways He meets us and directs us.

Today I am sharing some lessons I’ve learned about trusting God with my writing. Please scoot over to Novel Rocket and check out Lessons from a Rule-Breaker.

I pray you’ll be encouraged today that the Lord both knows your situation and is able to pull from his pocket of plenty a way for you to go.

Blessings

In the midst of a million things to do, there is One Thing

I’ve been noticing a reverse in the swing of the proverbial pendulum lately, a shift from the Give Me More things to have, stuff to do, friends to follow, books to read mentality, to a Do One Thing Well, Finish What You Start, have Fewer but Truer Friends one.

Well, maybe it’s not a universal movement. Maybe it’s just a message I hear wherever I go; you know how it is when you keep hearing or seeing the same thing, as though the One who directs your path is saying, “Do you get it now? how about now?”

I think it was the pile of unread books by my bed, and in my quiet corner, and on my work shelves that did it. An occupational hazard gone wild. I either buy and read so many books so fast that I don’t even remember them two minutes after I finish, or I don’t read them at all, but plan to—until another catches my eye.

Enough, I said. From now on I’m not buying another book until I finish what I have and review what I promised. And furthermore, I am going to learn—really learn, as in practice and do— at least One Thing from each of my nonfiction craft/life/whatever books.

As though to fortify my resolve, this idea about doing fewer things well and finishing what I start, began showing up all over the place.

For example, at a recent writer’s conference, the marketing class I took focused more on building smaller, more meaningful relationships based on reciprocity than ones focused on “it’s all about me. Marketing plans fill me with fear, but building meaningful relationships one person at a time, now that I can handle.

 One instructor, Torry Martin, inspired the idea of affirming or encouraging a certain number of other people each day before beginning my own pursuits. Hmm, have I heard something like this before—“think on others . . .”

And although I know lists are ever popular, two particular challenges came my way on the heels of each other. Although totally different topics, both are disciplines which reinforce the idea of finishing a few things well rather than starting a gazillion aimlessly:

Jeff Goins’ online challenge (15 Habits of Great Writers)and Kent & MacGregor’s  40 Ways to Get Closer to God.(I’m not very far along in this book because you can’t go on to the next day unless you’ve completed the first day’s focus. Not that I think of myself as a spiritual sluggard, but I did commit to their specific recommendations for forty days. )

Even Ann Voskamp with her powerful book One Thousand Gifts, reduces her search for God’s joy down to the pursuit of one thing: thankfulness. Now that’s doable.

In each of the above mentioned pursuits, there is an underlying need to be free of clutter and chaos. Perhaps it has something to do with my becoming a Woman of a Certain Age who is losing her multi-tasking skills, but I think it has more to do with not wanting so many distractions. 

Because I know that in the midst of a million things to do there is really only

                                                       ONE THING

I have asked of the Lord that I will seek: that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord and to inquire in his temple.—Psalm 27:4