Wind-Up Cars and Armed Warriors-- Going Backward to Go Forward

I buy wind-up cars—the kind you back up and then let loose to race across the floor. I bring them with me when I visit my numerous grandboys.—just pull one (car that is) out from my pocketbook and let it rip. They like it.

My mom tells me this fascination is deep-seated. One time I wound one up and put it to my ear, apparently mesmerized by the sound of wheels spinning. The problem was they were spinning around my hair, and within seconds I had a car dangling from the side of my head. She had to cut it out, which accounts for the pictures where the one in a skirt looks like a boy.

Which brings me to this New Year. As much as I love to start new things, before going forward, I had to backup. I wanted to see if I had absorbed the lessons and God-words, that I had committed to my journal in 2010 before dashing on to new horizons in 2011.

My Scripture verse for 2010 was “Be anxious for nothing but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be known to God…”—Phil.4:6. Well, I got part of that down—I certainly wasn’t hesitant about letting my requests be known by prayer and supplication. But the part about thanksgiving and not being anxious could probably carry over into this year.

From a study in Esther by Beth Moore, I was reminded “The worst time in the world is God’s time.” I have to admit, if you’re selling a house or looking for a job, He certainly seems to have a different clock, but then again, He does make spectacular entrances at JUST THE RIGHT MOMENT.

From Andrew Murray, I practiced Absolute Surrender (I say practiced because I just couldn’t ever seem to give it all up, but know this is a key.) My prayer from this surrender: May my life be proof of what the omnipotent God can do.

And two themes that were, and still are notable: Expectant and Equipped.

I KNOW that if I don’t expect anything of God, I probably won’t recognize Him even if He stands right in front of me. So, in the early morning hours, when I read my Bible, I expect to hear from Him. Otherwise I might as well read the newspaper.

And I am equipped for that which He has called me to do. A verse that latched onto my spirit this year was an odd one: Psalm 78:9: “The sons of Ephraim were armed and ready, yet they turned back in the day of battle.” I realized I turn back; I sabotage so many of my dreams because of fear. Fear of failure, fear of reprisal, fear of imperfection—fear of being stupid!

But God has equipped me and I need shoot an arrow through the heart of fear.

I’m all about a new year, a beginning, a human reminder that “His mercies are new every morning.” And I’m praying that I will live a life of faith in the One with whom nothing is impossible, and that everyone He gives me to pray for—from a one-legged Michelle Perry loving up on thrown-away kids in the Sudan, to a wayward son or daughter, will see the glory of the living God. And for you who read these words of my heart, may 2011 draw you deep in the wonders, and glories, and riches of God.